Your love life may have been dissatisfying in the past. You have a big appetite for love, sex and all that comes with those experiences, but somehow, your affairs have either left you wanting or have actually ended badly, with broken hearts and hurt feelings on both sides. You tend to fixate on your lover, erotically as well as emotionally; you obsess over them and their influence on you, and this can be too big a burden for many people to bear.
Your lover might pull away from you just to get a break from all that need and desire and possessiveness; just to breathe freely for a little bit! And when your lover pulls away, you become vindictive in response. One way to create more balance in your love life is to learn to let your lover pull away from time to time. This will be a difficult lesson for you, since you feel threatened by the idea that you don't possess or control your sweetie; but you shouldn't possess or control them. Each of us can only control ourselves, and that's something you'll have to learn. But you're certainly up to the task. Love has always been a growth experience for you, even when it's been painful instead of uplifting.