One thing can be said for certain about your love and sex life: By the end of it all, you won't be unchanged. Sex, especially, has the power to transform you, and this can take a lot of different forms -- some of them positive, and some of them less so. You may be a bit obsessed with sex, and pursue it purely out of a driving need to experience that change you undergo every time you're locked together with another person in a passionate embrace.
You're seeking to uncover your own inner truth, your very soul, through sexual contact with your lover, and while that can certainly work and will be wonderfully intense for both of you, it's also a tall order -- especially if you try to fulfill it every single time you make love with your sweetie. You may need to lower your expectations a bit about what lovemaking can do for you, and just take it more for what it is: fun, a great expression of love, a good way to work out some energy. That way, when you do encounter the transformative, intensely powerful variety of lovemaking, you'll be more than pleasantly surprised; you'll be swept off your very feet by the potency of your bond with your lover!