You have trouble accepting the validity of the institution of marriage, or even just the importance of commitment in a relationship. In some way, you either rebel against these goals or you just don't know how you feel about them. All you might know is that you're uncomfortable with the way that your relationships always seem to go.
Things start to progress, and you freeze up; or maybe you push for things to move along faster than is strictly natural, which isn't a great idea either. In some way, what you want out of a love affair is out of sync with what your sweetie wants, and with what most people accept as the common standard of a romantic affair: a physical attraction, an emotional bond, a deepening sense of intimacy that leads to commitment and beyond. For you, that progression of events feels unnatural, and it makes you nervous. But finding a partner in love who feels the way you do may not be the answer; if you did that, you might never reach your ultimate goal, which is an intimate love relationship with someone special. Looking to your honey for guidance will be difficult, but might be the lesson you need to stop getting in your own way.