This relationship has a big effect on your partner, but it might not be the one they would have hoped for. They're in need of personal transformation; during the course of your relationship they've worked toward graduating to a new level in their life, toward finding their path and following it, but they've found that their path conflicts with yours. You have a very strong idea of where you need to go in life, and you probably try to push your own ways onto your lover.
But what's right for you isn't always right for them, as hard as that can be to accept. You might have some very strong opinions (which you could forget are just opinions!) about where they're headed in life, and you may react strongly against any moves they make in that direction -- which could actually illuminate that this is, in fact, the right direction for them to follow. To make this more clear, let's try an example: Say your lover wants to be a writer, but you denounce that dream as wildly impractical and foolish. That, then, would actually be a sign that writing is just what they should do, despite your disapproval! This is the kind of battle you two wage with each other again and again. Will you let it lead to a breakdown in your relationship, or will you learn to accept your differences and encourage each other along your rightful path? It's up to you to choose.