There is a feeling of struggle between you -- an urge on your lover's part to be accepted and respected as an individual, pitted against your blind eye to who they are as a unique human being. Though you both bring the best of intentions to the relationship, there is some block in your view of your lover that obscures your perception of them as a person. Part of the problem is that you are dealing with feelings that exist on a deep, even subconscious level, feelings that obscure your ability to truly connect with anyone, much less this person.
Perhaps past relationship experiences have made you stand resolutely on your own two feet, even when your lover is pleading with you to let down your guard and let them in. Or it may be that you were brought up in a household that wasn't overtly affectionate, and you aren't used to the effusive displays of affection and declarations of devotion that come naturally to your lover. In some way, there's an emotional disconnect between you, a feeling of knocking on a door that just doesn't open. This feels frustrating at best, and could lead to argument or prolonged hurt silences. The only solution to this kind of problem is space -- which feels like the exact opposite of what you want between you! In some way, you have to give each other room and time to grow as individuals, as well as to grow together as a couple.