Even if you both had the best of intentions when you first met, be forewarned -- this relationship could be intense. The best relationships give us a better sense of ourselves and provide a strong foundation from which we can grow into the people we've always known we could be. Unfortunately, this relationship isn't that type at all; quite the opposite, in fact.
Instead of encouraging your lover to be the individual that they are, you attempt to dominate and control them, either through criticism, well-communicated disappointment or a host of other manipulative techniques. Instead of creating a feeling of lightness and joy together, you drag this person down into the bitter depths of human emotion. Don't misunderstand -- you don't consciously want to have such a negative effect on them; you simply aren't able to help it. You behave almost compulsively, as if you're acting out a script that's running through your mind. You keep secrets from them as a way of keeping them off balance, and you get into arguments whenever they try to move the relationship onto a more honest, aboveboard plane. This all sounds very harsh, and it is. Knowing beforehand what the negative potential is for this relationship might help you to forestall the trouble -- or avoid it altogether, by looking elsewhere for a love connection.