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Neptune quincunx Moon

The perfect relationship, or idealization

Kelli Fox

The extent to which you idealized your lover at the beginning of your relationship is really unfortunate, because it means that the longer it takes for reality to intrude, the more hurtful and disappointing it is when you finally realize that your expectations and impossible standards will never be met. You each want things to be a certain way between you, and your ideas may or may not match up. Even if they do match up, you aren't necessarily able to fulfill your dreams of 'the perfect relationship' -- for one thing, that just doesn't exist!

You might not think you should have to voice your expectations -- your lover should just tune in to what you're looking for in a love affair and respond accordingly, right? Wrong. If either of you has certain particular needs, it's up to you to make sure they're clearly communicated to your partner. Any lingering doubts about whether you want to be in this relationship also hurt the connection between you, so talk those feelings out rather than letting them fester. Talking openly and honestly is key, but it isn't easy. Expect your communication to be difficult at best.

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