This aspect hurts your bond as a close, loving couple, so you should both be aware of it so that you can try to avoid its most negative effects. The problem is, your lover tries to control you on some subtle or overt levels, and this behavior probably ends up bringing you down emotionally. This comes out most likely in the form of criticisms of your behavior; your partner just won't be able to keep quiet about their opinions if they think you're behaving in a less than respectable way.
When you're being subjected to this low-level control, you really don't like it. It hurts your feelings to always be subject to your lover's approval and, more often, criticism; you just want to be accepted and appreciated, and that doesn't happen often enough. If you tend toward insecurity or low self-esteem, this relationship could really hurt your ego even more. Of course, it might actually be that this feeling of constant discipline is coming more from an internal place than from your partner. Any small piece of advice could come across as criticism, even if it's not meant as such. If you can both be aware of this tendency and your lover can curb their criticisms then you can work at recognizing how much of your difficult interactions are really due to your own, internal feelings about yourself.