You don't understand why your lover wants to go where they want to go professionally. The way that you think about life, about your own role in society, about what's the most important work that you could do, is just different from how your partner looks at the same things. You've gotten to where you are in your work by following two completely different paths, and you might really disagree on which is the better path -- even if the one that each of you took worked fine for you.
It's hard to find common ground. You've just got two different perspectives on what's important as a goal in life. You might each view the other's career successes as meaningless or just not what you would've done. One of you has always taken the more abstract, impractical path, while the other has tended to play it safe, looking for solid results. Why can't you just respect each other's methods? You're two different people, not carbon-copy cutouts of each other. Try to change your perspective on things -- look for what you respect about each other's methods instead of what you look down on.