Is there such a thing as being too straightforward? Too honest? Expressing your opinion so bluntly that you spare no thought for how it may sound to the person you're talking to?
You may well have received such feedback from past partners, who have told you straightforwardly, honestly and so bluntly that it may have hurt your feelings. And this is the nature of your relationships up to now: You egged each other on, drove each other to excess, escalated the situation for good or for ill, no holds barred. Your conversations became a contest to see who can say the most shocking thing -- who could raise the most eyebrows.The energy between you and your ideal partner is best diverted to activities other than competitive verbal-arrow-slinging. Get physical, and not just in the sack. Get out there. Go horseback riding. Take a spin on a bicycle built for two. Sign up for a martial arts class together and find a useful outlet for all the oomph you two will create when you're together. It's a valuable natural resource -- appreciate it and use it wisely! Everyone will benefit if you do.