As a fun exercise, create a list of your past lovers. Hmmm, it's a list full of strange people, all right. Your lovers have been sexy for sure; compelling and exciting and quite attractive.
Whenever you introduced your friends, they always raved about the hotties you managed to bag. Yet there was always something unstable. Something restless. Your lovers couldn't seem to settle down and just be into you; there was always the sense that they had a roving eye -- and that it may even have landed on a friend or two of yours, or so you feared. You couldn't get comfortable. You couldn't relax. You felt like you had to be on guard to be in control.But there's no controlling your ideal lover, and that's the fun of it. It's kind of cool to be on your toes, to be forced into being your best self rather than relaxing into your typical self-indulgent laziness. Keep looking until you find just what you want -- someone exciting, someone who brings out your competitive side. Get to the chase, which quickens your blood. Go with it. Don't expect to wrestle your love to the ground and pin them for a count of three. Instead, hang on and dig the tumult; this is the kind of love that songs are written about.