Your mutual needs for partnership are completely opposite to your shared security needs, so building the kind of connection and commitment you're seeking will be a real struggle. Perhaps you're both looking for an emotionally attuned, mutually accepting partnership, for example, but you'll build your connection based on on a much more critical, exacting approach to commitment. You might never feel as if you're able to create the kind of partnership you want; similarly, you might feel as if your security needs aren't being met.
Still, you might both feel obligated to stay in this relationship, even if you're mismatched in some important ways. Any sense of security you're able to derive from this connection will be bound up with responsibilities and other limitations. You're likely to find each other's careers or families to be an unwanted restriction on your own life and time; you might also feel your relationship itself limits your freedom. You'll need to work together at finding the middle ground between what type of partnership you want to create and what you need to feel secure within the relationship.