Gotta give you credit: You meant well. It's just that you generally managed to make a mess out of what you had. You were never satisfied with what was on your plate; instead you were busy envying others for what they had.
Not only was your cup half-empty, it was spotted and chipped, too. That being said, your attitude may not have been ideal, but your choice of partners was: you went and found yourself someone who was just as dedicated to delicious havoc as you were. You and your lover shared a strong and sexy connection. One thing you could say about your relationship was that it was never boring.Nonetheless, you wanted it to be a bit more comfy. You couldn't always rely on your sweetie to be there when needed them, you couldn't ever relax and speak or act without thinking. But you had what you wanted at that time, a relationship that was always in flux and always exciting, even if it was a bit dangerous emotionally. You could have gone with it; indulged your need for drama and variety, and enjoyed the fact that it was your very lack of comfort with your lover that kept hard-to-please you always interested.