Your lover set your alarm bells ringing, in more ways than one. You went and did it again, didn't you? You chose a lover who kept you interested, but 'interested' didn't mean 'happy.' Your mate blew hot and cold.
You didn't like it, but you spent forever trying to understand it. Your natural loosey-goosey flexibility annoyed your partner, who liked limitations and roles and certainty. So you were slammed for anything that didn't conform to your lover's expectations, and petted and rewarded when you got along. The result was a henpecked you, too busy trying to live up to impossible standards to enjoy life with your honey.You felt as if you were addicted to the tumult of your pairing, but the comfort of staying in unhealthy patterns was trumped by the awful effect it had on your psyche. You needed to break the cycle. If you had wanted to stay where you were, you had to resolve to treat yourself with the respect you were worthy of, and demand that respect from others. You had to ensure that you got equal time, and asked for what you wanted. Your lover would have valued you more highly -- but most importantly, you'd have been happier with yourself.