The problem in your relationship is that both of you want to be the movie star, and there's no one left to play adoring fan. Each of you wants to hold the wheel and set the course of your love-boat; neither of you are willing to give an inch. So you're left with battles.
You argue over everything -- who's going to park the car, which of you iss responsible for choosing the horrible vacation spot. Small snafus become great big arguments, with both of you endlessly negotiating for control and power. The result? You're both exhausted, so busy spending all your energy in combat that there's little left over to be supportive and kind.On the good side, you are at least an equal match. In fact, that's partly what causes your problems. You both give as good as you get. This balance can be used for good as well as ill. Why not take on a problem together? Once you learn to work together more harmoniously, you will gain a mutual respect for each other's abilities. You'll be able to see the good in your mate. Then, rather than resisting just out of habit, a favorable feeling will occur that's bound to spread.