Pat Benatar once sang that love is a battlefield, and she certainly pinned the nail on you and your significant other. What you have here basically is an immovable object (your mate) meeting an irresistible force (chameleon-like you). You battle over problems large and small, particularly in the bedroom, where physicality is a weapon.
Your partner pushes you aggressively -- you slink away secretively. It may be that there's some moral issue keeping you apart -- is there something secretive and unhealthy about your pairing? Even if this is not the problem, there's some kind of unease, anxiety and confusion making day-to-day life with your sweetie a real drag.Change begins from within and so must yours. For make no mistake, you're going to have to be the one who changes first. Most importantly, you need a confrontation with reality. You must assume responsibility for the choices you have made, for who you are. You must acknowledge your inner conflicts without guilt or denial. Acceptance is your first step; and though difficult, it will bring you an inner peace that will radiate out to life with your partner.