You feel not quite in control of yourself when you are near your lover. There are complications -- bad surprises, situations you'd rather not be in. But something unconscious is making you feel compelled to submit, to go along.
You have always been one to give in to forceful lovers, but this time it's different -- you're not making a conscious choice to go along. Instead you're drifting on a current that seems stronger than your will, lost in emotions instead of acting from the intellectual part of yourself. Others ask you to justify your choices, you respond that you don't even know what you're doing yourself.The reason you cannot see clearly is that you're enacting old patterns from your past. It is only natural to want to heal from hurt by attempting to set the situation right, but you cannot change the past. You can only move forward. Casting your mate in your own little psychodrama takes time away from what you should be doing -- spending time together on equal footing. Such a feat is possible. But you must curb your tendencies to submit and silence yourself. Your lover will respect you more for standing up for yourself, and you will be happier for it.