Your mate calls you 'touchy,' and face it, the definition's not far off. You're rotten at communicating your thoughts and feelings, so how can you blame your partner for stepping squarely on hidden land mines? You react strongly to what you imagine to be deliberate slights, but look at the situation objectively.
If you're not going to tell people what you need as well as what bothers you, how can you expect others to avoid your tender spots? Not everyone is as sensitive as you, you know. Part of the problem lies in that extreme sensitivity. It's easy for you to put yourself in your mate's shoes, and to experience his or her problems almost as your own. But this sensitivity leads you to downplay, or even to ignore your own emotional needs.But playing martyr will get you nowhere. Other lovers may have reacted to your sulks and pouts by falling into line, but your current partner is merely confused by your actions. Why not try a different line of action? Have a few deep talks with your loved one. Discuss your feelings, your desires. It's not comfortable or easy for you, but you will improve in time. And your mate will have a better blueprint of your heart.